You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm too high and old for this...
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
