Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
he wants to bone in the snuggie
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
