Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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