feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
