I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
