Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
