I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Actions speak louder than pants.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
