it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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