What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
