I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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