What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
