my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
