please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
