haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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