What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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