I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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