my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
