Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
