I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
