You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
