OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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