so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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