She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
