Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize