idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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