too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I had to cum in my sink.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
