Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
