I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
