I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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