it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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