you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
