I swear she didn't look like that last week.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
