Kiss
Puke
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Drunk is a universal language darling
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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