She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
