There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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