i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
