I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You made out with two different species that night
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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