why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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