uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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