"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
