I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
