everyone is single if you try hard enough
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
