Plan B is the new Plan A
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
