Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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