I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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