Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
