dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize
