The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I need water and some morals
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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