Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
