Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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